Broke babies make their own fun

I have no money so I'm making things!
(visuals to come.)

What insomnia allows for

- night air
- watching cassiopia contemplate drinking out of the big dipper
- extended company of good friends
- 'What A Wonderful World' Radiohead and Louis Armstrong mashup
- the feeling of my sleeping kitten curled against the backs of my knees

Yes, I'm blogging again :P

It's funny because Mike and I were reading old blogs... and as dorky as it is, I also realize why I appreciate this shit. When I read my old stuff, I think "Who IS this girl?! That's not me anymore." That's a wonderful thing being able to physically see your own growth/change.

Some changes are easy to feel -- such as the change from being rich to being poor, which I have been experiencing lately. But slow gradual growth as a person isn't something you really notice and don't always get a chance to look back on.

Plus it's pretty funny reading about "like, how like amazing this day was ^_^ and how much i like totally love Jesus!!"

I'm going to COOK tonight. PEACE!

Today I am a Productivity Queen

Wake up
Brush your teeth
Feed the cat
Dress yourself
Go to the dentist
Go out for lunch
Get eyebrows threaded
Get cashmoney
Go to Roxton
Gather necessary items

Blog about it.

Get picked up by Deckster
Have coffee
Drop stuff off at home
Go to campus
See Laura
Go home
(Mop
Clean litter box
Paint)

*Everthing in parentheses are subject to changes after bed sighting.

June

I got a tooth pulled out today and aside from the bloody gauze sucking that I'm doing now, it was actually kind of a pleasant experience. The dentist was this hilarious guy who gave me laughing gas and said "drugs are good!" lol I was so high throughout the entire thing, I'm surprised I could follow directions. At one point I'm pretty sure my leg fell off the chair and it took a great deal of effort for me to heave it back on.

Aside from that, I had a really nice time with my mom today-- we talked about some really interesting stuff that she'd never shared with me before about herself and about my grandmother. It really provided me with some serious insight into myself and into spirituality. It's funny-- sometimes you think you know someone but really there's so, so much you don't. Stuff that makes you understand.

Life's been a little wonky for the past few days. Chancho's feeling it too-- he's nervous today... staring at something that isn't there, hair standing on end. It's kind of scaring me, but I locked us in my room (well, fai's room which is mine for the summer) and am painting and playing some music. Plus, the tylenol 3 is kicking in so good on that.

Things that make life good:
- my cat
- my paint
- taking 4 tylenols on the weekend by accident
- bonding with my mother
- the birthday cake icecream that's in the fridge

It's interesting how everything is interconnected. The way the shoes are scattered and the way the Swiffer is paused against the wall is so strongly connected with the mushy bowl of KD i have in front of me and the way the silence sags above the moan of the cars that are passing. The way you feel is connected with the way I feel and the way that guy on the street feels and the way the trees happen to be blowing today.

Everything is linked with everything, yet we are still alone.

The Night Makes You Think In Silence

In the silent dim glow is

me--

is you.

-- wrestling for answers.

live and learn

A couple weeks ago, Pooja and I were on the way to the bus stop and it started raining.

Me: Ughhhhhhhh..!!! Stupid rain.
Pooj: No man.... beautiful rain.

Beautiful storm.

The winds of change are blowing wild and free

Somehow listening to Will You Be There by Michael Jackson makes me want to type a few lines about my life.

I'm kind of at the point though, where so much has changed and so many little things have happened (that maybe I would've liked to write about at the time but now too much time has passed/there's too much and also too little to say) that I can't really sum it up. Fai and Pooj have just gone to bed and I'm slipping away too so going to make this quick-ish.

[Long wind blows through.]

Here's the moment:

I have dried paint all over my hands. I'm sitting on the hardwood floor in front of the couch which doubles as my pretty-much permanent bed. Waterloo's skyline mellows from the window on my right. Adele is loving on me. My foot is asleep.

No ruining it with thoughts of yesterday or tomorrow.

HELLS YES

Beware the Hatchers

My laptop has been funky again for the past little while so out of desperation, I'm using my parent's shitty desktop in their room. My dad has pretty much anhialated this computer with the amount of stuff he downloads/programs he uses on here. The thing is S L O W.

So my mother walks into the room and goes:

What are you doing? Why are you on this computer?

[Mind you, she knows FULL WELL my laptop's being messed up]

Me: My computer's broken.

Her: Which computer? [I only have one.]

Me: My laptop.

Her: Well don't break this one too. And don't download things. I don't want people to hatch our computer.

Things to do when you show up for work at 9am, but can't work til 1:

- intake indulgent substances
- come to the beautiful new main floor of DP where there is plenty of room because it is reading week!
- finish my '25 Random Things' list
- listen to calming music
- facebook
- watch grey's?

Watch Grey's!

Ah, there's the silver lining. :)

EDIT (10:12): Grey's isn't loading. I want this:

she really is!

I called Bee to say happy birthday today on my way to work.

Me: I'm on the bus.
Bee: The BUS??!
Me: Yeah. The New Jasmine takes the bus!
Bee: Wow! The New Jasmine is independent and green!

MMMMhmm!

I am currently making valentines.

Positivity

Really, it's better to give yourself reasons to smile through it then remember why you shouldn't. (It prevents you from doing things that are stupid and out of character.)

Today:
- i got to sleep in
- my computer is broken but that made me come downstairs and find the tea my mom made me
- nicole found my ipod at her place (which means i didn't drop it on the street! :) )
- i'm double shifting, but that means i don't have to find something to do between 1 and 5

I wish it wasn't so easy to feel dragged down.

Hey, Hannah's got it right!:

the problem with that is

I'm back in Waterloo, back at work after a more than fabulous weekend and it pretty much blows.

I'm just not sliding back in the groove too well today, that always happens though.

I completely 100% messed up the whole diet thing this wknd, so I guess its good that I'm back here where I can keep myself from eating!

And here's what Story of the Day told me today (how applicable.):

Money Matters
I think of it as an opportunity to find out how much money means to me, she said. So far, it means a lot more than I think is probably healthy.

We'll cast some light and you'll be alright for now

I should really be packing but I'm having soup and listening to Zero 7 instead.

Got some good new music from Sonya yesterday-- so good because she has decent taste and I've just been so bored of everything on my ipod. And there's really nothing like laying around in pj's, relaxing to new tunes. Not that I got to do that for very long or will get to do that much until next.. Thursday? Here's my favourite:



A lot of the ODAA office ladies say hi to me now because I'm there so often! And two of them came up to me in the kitchen the other day praising my healthy eating lol (I was taking a salad out of the fridge) and the one lady told me she eats 6 almonds every morning and that just gives you so much energy! :) The director of alumni affairs helped me figure out how to sort the recycling. And today I met the director of leadership giving which is cool because I've called some of her files before.

Life has just been very work-oriented lately. Working throughout the day and then hanging out with work people after. It's nice though, work friends are so chill and funny.

Also! Today is day 4 of healthy eating/hardcore diet! I'm going strong!!

Unfortunately, in exactly 1 hour I'm leaving for Toronto-- and I pretty much KNOW everything's gonna go down the crapper this weekend! Ahhh, well! I'll jump back on the bandwagon on Monday!

Happy Tuesday

Day 2 of Healthy Eating. Although I guess eating nothing but baby carrots isn't exactly healthy-- but i managed to get through the entirety of yesterday with no bread/pasta/potatoes/etc. And last night I bought a bunch of "healthy food" and lugged it to work. haha

I'm having a vegetable Soup at Hand for lunch (right now. and its not good.) and a spinach salad for dinner. Hardcore!!

This BETTER freaking work. lol

Also-- I finished reading Five People You Meeting in Heaven! And I'm going to compose two overseas letters today between 1 and 5! So productive.

Break over.

Fffffffffffffffffffffffffebruary!

Friggin. 2am and i have to get up in 6 hrs. I WORK SO MUCH I AM GOING INSANE!

Tomorrow i am DOING ART during the shift. I'm gonna sit at 17 and call and do freaking art because I'm at a creative standstill and it SUCKS.

Other things I plan to do tomorrow:

1. Finish Five People You Meet In Heaven (I always say this, but tm i really will.)

2. Eat no carbs.

PEACE AND LOVE. JOW TOW!

Organized Thought: Now in 3 Easy Steps!

1) I bought a Burt's Bees lip balm today. My lip is getting increasingly more chapped and I'm worried that it will never heal. I can't tell if its working or not but I'm slathering it on constantly. It hurts less at least, I think.

It smells like honey! :9

2) The working-all-the-time streak continues. I think I'm going to pick up even more shifts next week. Today I stayed at work for an extra 2 hrs helping John organize files, which is, surprisingly, kind of fun! haha

3) Met up with Ange today to talk about the Boar and I think I'm going to do a comic and help with a participatory art project. I'm a little unsure about the comic though. Because its supposed to make some sort of social commentary, and in all honesty, I don't know whether or not I have strong enough opinions for that.

Career Woman

Not by a long shot. But I have been spending a lot of time at work lately. It's funny, to go from being 90% sure of quitting, and instead picking up a million extra shifts. I feel like I live there. Maybe its because, until recently, work's the only thing I don't fail at. Or maybe its because I do desperately need the money-- that's the justification I prefer.

I'm looking forward to next week: Sound of Music, Winterlicious, meeting Maddy, Thrift Store shopping, etc. It'll be good.

A gift from Photobucket: