apology

sometimes when i talk about things-- like, how i had a bad day for example-- i make myself out to be the victim. i think i protagonize myself in the stories i tell; the heroine who tries her hardest but just can't overcome those ill-fated odds.
and sometimes i might even antagonize the people i love the most. even though, in my mind, they're not the antagonist at all, i am.
i think extreme disappointment in myself often is defensively set up in my stories and rants to appear like extreme disappointment in the world and people around me.

really that's not the case.

not that i'm ALWAYS, ALWAYS wrong. and generally i even STATE blatantly that i dont' mean to antagonize ppl adn that it's actually my fault but i guess my extreme errrr emotional output covers over those efforts. because people hear the way you say things more than the actual words that you say.

i guess this is some sort of lame apology... i shall try and connect my brain to my tongue more.

(p.s. social psych is the BEST course everrrrrrrrrrr! everything is so applicable and sensical haha)