it's one of those nights... i feel really mellow and blah. kinda depressed but i'm not actually sad about anything in particular. well i am sad about some stuff but those aren't the reasons i'm feeling like this. i think i have way too much on my mind.. stuff that i'm worrying over but really don't need to worry over. i kinda tend to overreact about everything or as some people like to call it-- i'm a big spaz =P =) *sigh* you know what i really feel like doing? talking on the phone. yes yes. but no. cuz the people that are awake at this hour AND don't have families that aren't awake at this hour aren't really in town anymore.. i guess i could make some long d calls ... but i just did. and i'm not exactly made of money. and plus it's getting a bit late to call long d especially if people live at home =P so i decided i will just be depressed on the internet: blogging is great: a way to relieve stress as opposed to other ways that make you become obese including indulging myself in bucketfuls of chocolate icecream.
life sucks sometimes. here's a few things that are wrong with my life:
1) i miss people. i miss people SO MUCH. i miss people SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO MUCH. i'm sure you get the picture.
2) the guy i am infatuated with at this point-- will never EVER see me the way i see him. and he prolly doesn't so much as even know in the back of his mind that i exist except for once a week for about five minutes and sometimes a bit more than that but not often. and no. that doesn't boost my self esteem ... not like i had any to begin with anyways so i guess it really doesn't matter. i suddenly find it quite pathetic that i often ponder so much about love and such when i myself have absolutely no love life (kat-- this is the true meaning of the word pathetic.) nor will i ever have one. i will probably end up being an old maid, live in a rickety shack, chasing away the neighbors and their animals with my broomstick day after day after day after day... and one day i'll probably die and no one will even notice especially not this guy.
3) i have no finger nails. this is technically my fault since i bite them. wait. i have fingernails.. but they are really short is all... not like there's no nail because that would jsut be gross. does anyone know a way to stop biting my nails? because i for surely don't and i'd realllllly like to stop. so i can aquire some nails.
4)i miss people SOOO SOOO SOOO SOOO SOOO SOO much.
i'm sure there are more things wrong with my life that i just can't think of at the moment. i don't think my glasses are very "rose tinted* today. more like *mellowyellow tinted* i hope i'll be in a better mood tommorow then maybe i can actually blog about something interestng besides how pathetic and dumb my life is.