outside blue skies shine and wind kisses the trees. but exams are here and the rustling of papers and bustling in the halls shakes me. cardboard boxes being packed away, the sounds of sisters you will never really see again.

well, see, yes. but that's jsut not the same.

people just can't understand i guess. but i'm trying to. and it's not easy holding in screaming tears, swallowing them, like a bitter powder. your tongue dries like dust, it clings to the roof of your mouth as you try and smile.

for my own sake, and for the sake of others, i will try harder than hard to keep a happy face on. to live these last 3 weeks with anticipation and gratitude.

play on.